Taxing Tom Tom

31 03 2005

I came across this snippet “Taxing Tom Tom” in “The Week” (The weekly magazine). Goverment goes creative. Goverment goes nasty. Government makes money.

The good citizens of Rajmuhndry, Andhra Pradesh get up everyday to the sound of music. Alright, almost music. The authorities have hired 20 drummers to wake up all the tax defaulters every morning. (Talk about morning alarms). These hapless defaulters are then asked to pay up the tax or go through the wrath the next morning as well. And would you believe it, these drummers have had some success. Authorities have been able to collect 18% of their tax deficit from these defaulters. Or who knows may be from their helpless neighbours.

Its nasty business, but its good to see that someone in the politicians or babus (bearaucracy) still has some sense of humour and quite a bit of imagination.


Orkutting – Its Different!

28 03 2005

Remember that Maggi Hot and Sweet Tomato Sauce ad, featuring Javed Jaffery and Pankaj Kapoor, with its instant hit tag line “Its Different!”

One of my best-est hobby happens to be Orkutting, in fact it rates a close second to Googling. Orkut is fun even though the fact that it gets the most number of hits on its Error page. (Error Page? That Omnipresent Bad Server – No Donuts for you page.) And checking People’s Profile (if they have a real image posted) is even more fun.

Go to Orkut and they will dazzle you by “You are connected to 4699212 people through 57 friends.” 57 friends – 4699212 people. Bahut Na Insaafi hai re! And you would waste your next 25-30 minutes to seeing some of these 4699212 people. Its Different Mega timepass. In fact it would rate only second to Googling in time pass. Speaking of which it reminds me Blogging at BlogSpot is the first cousin to both Googling and Orkutting when it comes to Timepass. And mother of all ironies, all the sites are owned by Google! (As if you didn’t know huh.)

To conclude – Google has sprung up an empire for themselves because people like us are timepassing their time on Google Flagship Products. (My apologies to those who can kill or martyr for Google!)

But what the Hell is common to Maggi and Orkut?
Nothing! Just remembered the Maggi sauce advert, even though Maggi advert was a good timepass.


The Big List!

24 03 2005

When I was a small boy, my sis always used to recite that longest WORD in english –
“Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”. It actually looks smaller than it sounded. But none the less it was ominous. As most in those days no one cared what it meant as long as they could. And I was the poor boy who could not even recite it. Hell! I couldnt even make its syllables and phonetics leave alone the pronounciation of the whole word.

It just struck me today and I wanted to know that wretched longest word and its meaning. Well here goes! It means “Gibberish”, nothing, nada. It was a word that was used for a song of Mary Poppins – that Disney Movie. According to some accounts, it was stolen from another song which actually went “Supercalafajaistickespeealadojus”. Which according to some was originally “super-cadja-flawjalistic-espealedojus”. But it still always meant only gibberish.

Actually the longest word in english dictionary (oxford says) is “PNEUMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANOCONIOSIS” a grand 45 letters, 11 more than “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”. Its a respiratory disease!

Another word “aequeosalinocalcalinoceraceoaluminosocupreovitriolic”. (Did i see your jaws touching the floor?) This word was used by Dr Edward Strother (1675-1737) to describe the spa waters at Bath. Huh!!!

But the longest English word that actually means something worthwhile (again thats upto you to decide) would be “ANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARIANISM”, which means the belief which opposes removing the tie between church and state. uh huh! And you may find some who just add psuedo to it to make it the “PSUEDOANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARIANISM” to make it equal to the original big 34 letter word.

OK! Thats about it for the longest word. But before you go on to the next blog, could you please give me directions to this place:
“llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch”. Its supposed to be somewhere in Wales!

To be a Rock and not to Roll!

18 03 2005

I never really understood why Metal and Heavy Metal ever got so famous. I know I may upset a lot of people who like Metal and they have the right of their opinion. And this is nothing about criticizing their taste in music. But I am just kind of wondering out loud.

I brought out some of my old CDs and suddenly an Iron Maiden popped on my boombox. Now, what kind of freak would make a song called “Bring you Daughter, Bring Your Daughter to the slaughter, Let her go let her go let her go!” I remember hearing this song a long time ago and never liking it one bit, except that the absurdity of the lyrics caught my attention everytime I played it.

Which gets to the second part of Metal that I never got to get tuned to – The Vocals and Lyrics. I mean that apart from being lucky enough to catch any vocals at all, you would need to be God to make out the Lyrics without Googling for a little help. But then sometimes you just need to hear Metal to know the music can be made out of noise as well. Well you would feel like drums and guitars all but trying to tear each other apart but they still manage to stay in sync. Amazing!

Being someone who has over the years I have grown into Rock and slowly gone into classic rock, I am just satisfied with my Simon and Garfinkle, Bob Dylan, Pearl Jam, Lynyrd Skynyrd, CCR, CSNY and the kind, where vocals and lyrics either dominate or atleast level up with instruments.

Marketing – The Mafia Way!

15 03 2005

17:15 Hard at work!

17:45 Still hard at work, thinking of taking my hourly stroll and give my back some rest.

18:10 Still working, somebody must have glued my rear to the seat.

18:25 Mail from a friend. Kapish!!! The same ol’ mail: Now that you have smiled, send this mail to everyone in your address book and blah blah blah…. (Anyway, my address book is always empty!)

18:30 Now that I have been brought out of my slumber I may as well take my stroll…

18:40 Back to the seat. Impending disaster! Client call tonight! Changes asked for are still far from deliverable. Call to the development floor. Few choicest words of encouragement. (Some times its carrot, this time it has to be Stick! Anyway, I would be taking it it this evening, so why not just have it given.)

18:45 Browsing Internet . Come across a website
Save Toby. This website has been gathering a lot of attention.

Some people find it funny and others find it animal rights violation. Personally, I found it hillarious! Heh! this guys is nuts! Holding the little TOBY at ransom and making the good samaritans pay. (But one hell of a business idea. He’s even got PayPal integrated to the site for donations :)) )

18:55 Impending Disaster! Back to work! Check out the site and enjoy it. I think the owner of the website actually likes Toby. And he would be nuts to be killing the cute little thing.


The Senseless and the Senile!

4 03 2005

You can’t wear Tricolour on your Helmet!

You would think that politicians were born in mars and they are as alien to the earth as any alien can be. And I wouldn’t blame you if you feel that way, because all they do is end up acting as a senile bunch, defying all sense.

First Indian to break into the Formula 1 scene ever, just wants to wear his country colours on his helment and share his proud moment with all the Indians. And what he gets is a formal letter warning him to do say and face consequence.

Narain is annoyed and he has the right to be so. So would any person who feels strongly about his country. So would you, if you were told that on the day you acheived your life time ambition (and in doing so making your country proud), you can not don your country colours. The reason “Law of Land” doesnt allow that.

When I read this story on the internet, I was so angry and later I laughed so hard that my friends thought I might die! Ask any kid on street about how many “Laws of Land” these upholders (politicians) of law would have broken to reach where they are now and he would keep reeling on with cases till he well overgrows his puberty.
And yes I am annoyed because like many others, I have waited for 10 years to see Indian Tricolour on the helment in an F1 car.

If the Law of Land does not permit it, then rewrite the law of land! If you cant be loyal to your country yourself, atleast let those who want to be proud and be patriot be so.